Tuesday, April 9, 2013

Postpartum Body poem.

**I did NOT write this poem, I saw it on pintrest and loved it.**
 
 
 
 
Once upon a time,
My skin was smooth.
Unscarred.
It created soft dips down between bones.
My hips were tight and narrow.
My breasts were small and round.
 
But with the energy of new life,
Every cell in my body was changed
And forgot the old ways of being.
Things became displaced…
My skin stretched over growing life.
It tore under the power and energy of my baby.
My hips moved apart to enable birth,
Creating a passage to travel.
My breasts grew, and the skin tore there too.
 
My body was scarred from a knife
That created new a passage across my abdomen 
 for my baby to travel.
 
And now I am a mother.
And I am softer. And I have more give,
In my mind and in my body.
My skin is loose,
As it reaches over my body.
Marks from stretching create
Deep crevices and silvery trails.
Like a road map showing the journey
My baby and I trekked to get to where we are today.
 
My breasts continue the work of my body.
Protecting.
Full of life. Full of love.
Flowing with energy.
Creating a bond impossible to replicate.
 
I have a scar.
A marks from when I birthed; my birthmark.
It was touched by new life.
Within that scar is a memory:
That scar tells of the final moment my baby was inside me,
and the moments my baby existed in two worlds.
 
My hips are wider.
They have held the weight of my child.
They have held my whole world.
I created life.
If I was a scientist, I’d get a nobel prize.
But I am a woman, which is infinitely better.
My prize knowing that I made my little boy.
 
I grew him.
My body grew him.
And for that, my body deserves grace.
Respect. Admiration.
Love.
It created life.
It created pure perfection.
And because of that
My body is perfect.
 
My body deserves to be loved.
My body deserves my love.

Sunday, February 3, 2013

Why is loosing weight so hard?

I wish I could just snap my fingers and  magically weigh 160 pounds like I was when I first met Luis.  I was so motivated in loosing weight but for some reason I just kinda gave up last week. It's really hard for me to loose weight and stay on a strict diet because I LOVE FOOD!! My son and boyfriend have no interest in my healthy foods or snacks so I find myself cooking food and eating food they like. We haven't ate out in a few weeks so I'm guessing that is why I haven't gained any weight I'm just stuck at 210. :( I really want to try again and set a new goal of weighing 190 by the first week of may (We are going on our Disney vacation).

Monday, January 28, 2013

Things I feel guilty about..

 
This is a totally random post but it's just something that has been on my mind today so I had to write it down somewhere. :)
 
I had a conversation with one of my mommy friends today and one of the subjects that we were talking about was "Things we feel guilty about now that we are Mommy's"... Well I have to admit that One of the things I always feel guilty about is shopping for myself. I can't remember when the last time I went shopping for myself was. Every single time I go to the mall or any store I promise myself that I will buy myself something but It just never happens. Sometimes when I see a pretty purse or some super cute shoes I put it in the cart but I stop myself because I feel guilty I'm not sure why.
 
Another thing I feel guilty about is leaving my son with my  grandma so that I can have some "Me time". I know that it's completely normal to be baby free every now and then but I feel like my son will feel like I am abandoning him and It just breaks my heart. I go Mon-Fri to the gym for an hour and the whole way there I feel guilty but I still go because It helps me get rid of all my stress, especially my zumba and kick boxing class. There's days when I feel like just going for a pedicure but since it's not on my priority list I always end up saying next time.
 

Saturday, January 12, 2013

It's our anniversary.

    I can't believe that it's been four years already!! This man is my best friend, the father of my child and the love of my life. Yeah I know, I sound super cheesy but it's the truth.
    We have been through so much together but no matter what we still managed to make our relationship stronger than ever. I'm not going to lie and say our relationship is perfect because I don't think there's such thing as a "perfect" relationship but we both have learned to work things out and talk about what ever is bothering us before it becomes something more serious. 
      I see the bond that he has with our child and it just melts my heart seeing how much love they have for each other. I thank god everyday for putting him and our baby in my life because they both make me the happiest women alive. I would not trade the life I have for anything.
 

 

Monday, January 7, 2013

Potty Training..

I have been talking to my son about the potty and the whole process since he was about 18 months old. In the beginning he loved sitting on the potty but after a while he didn't want anything to do with it. A few of my mommy friends told me that he probably wasn't ready yet so I decided to take a break. As soon as he turned two (Sept. 30th) I decided that it was time to give potty training another try. He was excited the first few days because I bought him one of those character seats that you put on a regular toilet. After a few days once again he wanted nothing to do with potty training so I bought him some big boy undies and thought maybe those would help but I was wrong. I started rewarding him with his favorite snacks, Letting him watch his shows while on the potty, singing songs, reading books but nothing I do seems to interest him so now I'm out of ideas and about ready to pull my hair out!! :( I received a call today from early preschool informing me that they had an open slot for my son but he has to be potty trained. I have no idea how I am going to get him fully potty trained by the end of February but I'm crossing my fingers that he learns soon.

Sunday, December 30, 2012

Loosing weight isn't easy!!

I have been on this "journey" since November 6th 2012 and it hasn't been easy at all. The first few weeks were easy and I was eating clean and healthy. We've been on a budget because of the holidays and buying gifts for the family so I haven't been able to shop at whole foods like I usually do. Good news is the holidays are almost over so No excuses. On another note I've been keeping up with my gym routine sadly I'm stuck at the same weight as my last weigh in meaning I have only lost 10 pounds so far, but at least I'm not gaining any right? I posted a picture on Instagram in the beginning of my journey about a size 13 jeans that I was determined to fit into.. Well they wouldn't close at all before but last week I tried them on and ta-da they zip!! Lol ok they don't exactly "fit" but it's progress so I'm proud of myself for that. :)


Friday, December 7, 2012

15 Random things about me.

1. My son is the love of my life and he comes first before anyone else.


2. I DON'T read instruction. Honestly I'm not sure if it's because I find them confusing or just a waste of time.


3. I love rainy days. :)


4. I am really good at blocking/forgetting/ignoring things that don't make me happy.


5. I am not shy at all. In fact I'm super friendly and talk way too much.


6. I don't like going to movie theatres I rather watch a movie at home.


7. I am a twilight fan. #Teamjacob lol.


8. I love sushi. I would seriously eat it everyday if I could.


9. I always go to bed with both of my socks on and ALWAYS wake up with only one on. My son has that same problem.


10. I don't care much for soda I would much rather drink some unsweetened iced tea.

11. When I'm working out I block everyone out so if you see me starring at something and think I'm day dreaming about you, chances are you're wrong and I'm just in my "Zone".


12. I love my mom and grandma so much even though I probably don't show it too often.


13. I want one more child and then I'm getting my tubes tied.


14. I enjoy watching cartoons with my son and Cherish every moment with him.


15.  I have two tattoos.. well one all together but first I got a hello kitty with music notes and eventually added plumerias around it.